Top 6 Things Beardsmen Should Avoid

—Wil Mouradian

Mahesh is back for another round of Mahesh's Musings, and today he's going to cover the most important things to keep away from your beard (unless you always keep your favorite beard wash and beard softener on hand at all times). 

1. Creamy food.


Creamy, dairy-based foods have an uncanny tendency of dripping down your beard and covering your mustache. The longer the dairy particles sit in your beard (even when you try to wipe them out), the more they break down and begin to smell like what they are - rotting food. If you're eating creamy food in public and can't get around it, find a way to stop off in the washroom and wash it out of your beard and mustache before continuing with your day. 

2. Smoking 


Smoking with facial hair can pose problems because the chemical makeup of smoke stains your beard and stache yellow. That same chemical makeup also causes the scent to stick, which is why you can always tell when you get in a smoker's car or get a smoking room at a hotel. This "sticky" smoke also clings to your facial hair in a surprising way - even multiple washes in the washroom can fail to get the scent out of your beard (especially if you have a styling product in it already). 

3. Open coffee drinks


Drinking creamy coffee or espresso without a "sippy cup" lid will cause your beverage to saturate your mustache. Do you want to carry on with your day while inhaling the scents of old coffee and sour milk? Probably not, so we recommend getting your own re-useable coffee cup to control that splash radius. There are plenty to choose from online - including portable cups and "mustache mug" options. 

4. Glitter


Guys - just avoid glitter if you can. It takes multiple washes and comb - throughs to get out of your beard, and you'll likely find glitter everywhere you go (because it never really leaves). While glitter beards have been a popular internet trend for a year or two we're telling you now: you do not want to deal with the aftermath. Plus, glitter is actually pretty rough on the environment.

The little plastic particles wash out into your sink or shower drain, and that water eventually travels to the ocean. Fish eat the glitter thinking it's food. If they don't die, they're then fished to feed humans... then we eat the glitter. The more you know!

5. Pasta


Yes, pasta is delicious. Yes, we love that bowl of carbohydrate saturated cheesy goodness. Yes, it gets all over your facial hair when you eat it, and no single beardsman is immune 100% of the time. Like with dairy and coffee, the sauce gets trapped in your beard and 'stache and begins to smell if you don't wash it out immediately. If you've got a lighter beard, you can also see sauce drips and spray spots in it from across the room, too. If you can't say no to delicious saucy pasta, just try to take smaller, more controlled bites to avoid a giant mess on your face.

P.S. - Help a Brother Out

If you see someone with food or beverage in their beard - let them know! We can't see our beards and wouldn't willingly leave a corn chip in them, so let's help each other (and thus ourselves) out with this.

Have you ever gotten home from a long day and noticed your fly is down? You probably wondered how long it was down, and wish someone had told you. Letting someone know they've got junk in their beard is acting on the same principle. 

6. Chlorine


Chlorine is most often found in pools and jacuzzis, like in apartment complexes or public swimming areas. Chlorine is a powerful chemical that stains, dries, and damages your hair if you don't rinse it out appropriately. Every time you immerse your beard in chlorinated water, be sure to rinse your hair out thoroughly before carrying on with the day. 

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